When The Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive. Genesis 29:31
Our Father is a gracious father, who loves us unconditionally. His heart breaks for the things that break ours no matter how big or small. He grieves when we grieve, he rejoices when we praise and his desires to see us prosper in a hopeful future.
But by proposer, I don’t necessarily mean financially. I mean to flourish in the places he has put us; to have hope and joy beyond circumstance.
Leah was given to a man that did not want her and The Lord saw her. He wanted her to be loved and appreciated, so He blessed her with Child.
She gave him praise, but like us, far too often, she worshiped God while clinging to her earthly desires- expecting him to answer her prayers and heal her wounds in the way she felt was right and just.
“The Lord has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.” Genesis 29:32 B
Three more times would Leah conceive, each time thanking God while focusing on her plans and making clear her expectations of Him… God that is.
Hear that. Expectations.
Oh how I have expectations for my life. And make them very clear to my Father. So often I dawn a Leah mindset, making known and clinging to my hopes and expectations for this life, like he owes me something for my “allegiance” to him.
But heres the thing; our hopes and expectations are so small! Compared to what God is capable of, our plans are akin to making sand castles in the mud slums because the idea of white sand at the beach is incomprhensible.
The problem isn’t that our expectations are too high – it’s that we are far too easily satisfied.
Keeping our fists clenched, clinging to hopes for a “pretty little life,” we stifle space for God in our plans…
We don’t leave room for miracles!
Because that’s what he is capable of if we’ll simply make room and let him!
Yes, that’s what I desire to see in my life, more than the fulfillment of my demands and expectations. They never satisfy anyway… for long.
Why? Because theres a hole in each of a us; one that God artfully created for a purpose and that purpose is him. It’s a void that only he can fill.
But so often, we try and stuff it full of the things of this world- distractions, busyness, influence, significance, accomplishment, possession, control– even good things, like service and loving others – and allow our actions to blink a no vacancy sign to the baby looking for an inn.
And when the sign flashes, God moves on.
No he doesn’t leave us. No he doesn’t disown us and not love us.
He simply knows how we’ll respond. He searches for an open hole- a willing and longing heart that desires to know him- to hear him…
to live for him, rather than ourselves.
It wasn’t until her fourth child, that Leah would mature enough and let Go of her expectations, simply giving God praise and surrendering her need to be loved by a man.
“This time I will praise the Lord.” Genesis 29:35
What heart ache could God have spared her if she had simply run to him from the start? How powerfully could he have revealed himself to her and comforted her, if she would have trusted him for the answer? How many laps around the mountain and years wandering in the desert of despair could he have saved her from, giving her joy and contentment in its place? How could he have used her to relate to others in similar situations and bring him glory?
We’ll never know. But if his promises are true, and I know they are, it would have been something to write home about!
Because when we seek him with our whole heart, there we will find him. And when we ask for what we need to do his will, he will give it to us abundately. And when we trust him with our lives, he will finish what he has started in us, taking our threads to weave a masterpiece.
A life that shines of his Glory and goodness.
Let’s not be like Leah or the Israelites wandering in the desert.
Lord help us to trust you with our lives, beyond our feelings and our circumstance, clinging to your promises and running to your for our every need. Because you are our best friend, our confidant, our healer, our comforter, our forgiver, our only hope and security! Help us to love you with our whole hearts and desire to know you unlike anyone one. Because the more we seek your face, the more we’ll taste glory and live the life we were made for!